Savage Love
"What strikes me as tragic about this mess is that the men who are suffering the most for the high crime of wanting to meet a kinky woman — the men who shared their real names, numbers, places of employment — were doing the decent, responsible thing. Women into BDSM exist, and they take out personal ads to find men who share their kinks. People like me tell submissive women (and men) to take some simple precautions before hooking up with a new person — get his real name, get his real phone number, have your first meeting in a public place, ask him to tell you where he works, ask for references. A kinky top is asking a kinky bottom to trust him — not to actually harm her, to respect her limits, to honor her safe word — and a top can earn that trust by sharing his real name, phone number, and other info that will allow the bottom to confirm that he is who he says he is.
That’s why Fortuny’s stunt pisses me off so much. It’s the men that did the right thing — again, the guys who shared their real names and phone numbers, the men who sent face pictures and not just cock shots — who are going to suffer the most. However kinky these guys are, however naive they are (some personal ads are too good to be true, fellas), they shouldn’t be punished for doing the right and honorable thing."
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posted by 3 Blind Mice @ 12:39 PM
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